Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
