Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
