I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do