I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
