called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Randomize
