A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
