ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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