I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
