White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
