Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
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did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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