Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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