thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
