whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
