Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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