Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
