he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I want to be your penis for a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize