Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Randomize