I want to stick my p in your. b.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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