How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
