I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
