Why are handjobs necessary in class?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
