i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
