so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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