What a fucking waste of an outfit
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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