Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
