Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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