Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
