Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
