fuck your aforementioned shoe
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
