Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Randomize
