return my video game
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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