Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize
