fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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