She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
