all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
