You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
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