i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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