So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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