Whoa Z and x make the same sound
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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