I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
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Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
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You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize