I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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