I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
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