By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
