the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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