Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
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I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
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5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I won't apologize to a one balled man
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.