Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  How is your vagina???

  (941): View more from Florida

  Double booked

  (646): View more from New York

  With your butt?

  (941): View more from Florida

  Totes, candlesticks and all

  (646): View more from New York

  Yay!!

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  (646): How is your vagina??? (941): Double booked (646): With your butt? (941): Totes, candlesticks and all (646): Yay!! http://tfl.nu/9v3z
  Replies (4) Good night (1961) Bad night (771)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.

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  (563): that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark. http://tfl.nu/i86g
  Replies (13) Good night (1100) Bad night (2341)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b

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  (215): i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b http://tfl.nu/ogbj
  Replies (47) Good night (2358) Bad night (6382)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?

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  (313): How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going? http://tfl.nu/4fop
  Replies (11) Good night (1213) Bad night (4153)
• Favorite

  (235): View more from

  I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.

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  (235): I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick. http://tfl.nu/7zv4
  Replies (55) Good night (2230) Bad night (6517)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.

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  (619): I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning. http://tfl.nu/8wyf
  Replies (15) Good night (6784) Bad night (1470)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.

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  (706): So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob. http://tfl.nu/v79f
  Replies (26) Good night (1306) Bad night (7034)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.

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  (209): You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him. http://tfl.nu/xni0
  Replies (15) Good night (4009) Bad night (1418)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.

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  (503): Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate. http://tfl.nu/7ogi
  Replies (13) Good night (2597) Bad night (870)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina

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  (573): Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina http://tfl.nu/35k1
  Replies (7) Good night (644) Bad night (2692)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston

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  (559): Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston http://tfl.nu/g2h3
  Replies (3) Good night (2069) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober

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  (716): I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober http://tfl.nu/smc1
  Replies (8) Good night (1653) Bad night (742)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.

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  (248): Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real. http://tfl.nu/avlt
  Replies (15) Good night (2532) Bad night (633)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.

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  (434): They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me. http://tfl.nu/rhi7
  Replies (3) Good night (1904) Bad night (323)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"

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  (727): After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer" http://tfl.nu/pzul
  Replies (4) Good night (1054) Bad night (371)

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