I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
