Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize