Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
i believe in u and ur pee
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize