There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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