why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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