I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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